Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
My feelings are currently in a sea of vodka and "I don't give a shit"
Aren't they always?
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
Dress was in bathroom covered in shards of glass, earrings on living room floor, bracelet still missing, purse in backyard. The cast of Princess Bride all left the bar to make sure I was ok. Perfect night
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
Like seriously how stupid drunk do you have to get befor you start finding dolphin lighters and shit in your undergarments
What was the name of that sleazy asshole I'm not allowed to sleep with?
Randomize
