All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
A guy at the bar bought me a jag bomb because I'm the chick that frosts his donuts at KT. Never have I been more proud of being a failure at life.
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
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