Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
splinters make it hard to masturbate
two words...techno handjob
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
Randomize
