Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
I just realized I am holding a beer in 133 out of 134 photos of me on my facebook page.
Nobody is perfect
I'm at Waffle House wearing one of the paper hats in the other
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
I will give you the couch, a small portion of the fridge, and plenty of beer.
Got my future figured out. I'm oddly comforted. Thanks, bro.
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
So apparently, after 11 beers, 2 pitchers of sangria and 3 rhum & cokes, the idea of popping a load of MD and jumping on the trampoline, in the woods, in my underwear was the best one ever.
I’m literally lecturing this class on professionalism, while my body is undoubtably covered in leftover cum from last night. I’m a fucking role model.
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
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