The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
we came into the house to find you doing shots by your self and when we told you to stop you locked yourself in the bathroom...
did I at least say anything...
you meowed at us and said you're a cat and cats drink for a living
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
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