Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
I need a good reason NOT to eat this entire jar of nutella right now
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
You're like the curious george of whores
What's a nice way of saying "You fell asleep, and I got bored, so I made out with your brother"?
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
I'm drunk and kinda wanna go home but now I have to go have more sex, my boxers are in the dryer
You now have a new job. Call me around 1pm everyday and make sure I've eaten something. All I've had today is dick and cheesecake.
Randomize
