ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
He had a number 3 tattooed on his penis. And when I asked what it meant, he said " you know like dale earnhardt, the intimidator".
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
Fuck. I think I can already feel tomorrow's hangover. It's like future me cane back to warn present me about the impending doom but didn't turn the time dial back far enough.
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
Randomize
