Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
He left an unopened 12 pack of beer by my bed. I guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex..
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
All the alcohol I spilled on myself must have acted as a disinfectant or something. I haven't showered in three days and I still don't have a staph infection from sleeping on the lawn with you.
he doesn't even text me anymore.. he just facebook chats me a shark emoticon which has turned into code for 'be naked at my house in 15 mins'
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
Pretty sure the guy at the Halloween party dressed as an ice cream man is working his way through the building without a care for gender or age. He high-fives me on his way out each morning.
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
Randomize
