I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
I think scott just propositioned me for sex
Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
you really are a gigantic fucking slut.
sidenote: just remembered sarcasm does not translate through text
it's probably a bad thing that i wasn't even offended, huh?
My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
I love my grandma, but if I have to sit and watch one more show on Bravo, I'm gonna burn her fuckin house to the ground
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
They already have a joint checking account. She's got his balls in her purse! What's next, a shared Facebook account?
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
Randomize