No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
I just pawned the ring from my ex boyfriend to replace the ring I lost from my current boyfriend. #thanks
"Nobody needs to know that I have a vibrating butt plug and nobody needs to know that I'm probably gonna start wearing it at work"
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
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