there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
I'm having a staring contest with a raccoon.
Where the hell are you
He's winning.
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
Randomize