chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
Apparently it's illegal to hit pedestrians with coke cans... But the cop complimented my arm. That's a win in my book.
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
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