Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
you wouldn't come out from under your bed because you said there were six-armed bears everywhere.
ohhh that explains the pepperonis I found in my sock drawer this morning...
no it doesn't.
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
Auto correct isn't even working for how drunk you are
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
Randomize
