Hey theres a creepy ass guy stalking our house.i would look alive geting in 2nite.
I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
he said i give him, and i quote, "emotional blue balls"
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
I woke up to my dog puking on my bed. Looks like it was a successful night for us all.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
Randomize
