So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
I'm sitting here in nothing but my panties, eating beef jerky and reese's for breakfast.Today is not the day to expect me to make sound life decisions.
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
"I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance."
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
if you and your penis don't hurry up, I'm getting drunk without you.
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
Randomize