doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
at some point when you're making out with the ex girlfriend of your ex fuck buddy who happens to be the ex boyfriend of the girl that you just got drunk with who was hitting on your current fuck buddy who is best friends with your ex boyfriend, it just hits you: oh my god i need to get out more and expand my social circle.
I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
the best part was when he threw his debit card on the table, looked at everyone and said "turn this into pizza!" It felt like a scene in a 'coming of age' teen comedy.
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
An outback commercial just played and I remembered that guy from Australia Imade out with at the Derby. Great Bachelorette Party, btw.
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
Would you please stop exposing your tits on my couch?
Fuck you, my tits are fabulous
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
Randomize