Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
Something growled at me in your dark backyard last nt. Hoping it was my landwalking laser sharks and not Andy.
i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
Just got into a fight with a trashcan, today is obviously not going to be my day.
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
Do you know who these girls are? They're baking a cake, making chicken enchiladas, and bringing me beer everytime I finish one.
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
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