i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
Fuck appropriateness.
Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.
I worship thee.
I seriously just caught my 15 year old little sister with a positive pregnancy test coming out of the bathroom. Honest to God.
I have a coat hanger and a baseball bat. Her choice.
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
I hijacked a bellboy cart and rolled into the party dancing on it
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
He sent me nudes and then a text asking if I tried the new Cantina Bowl from Taco Bell. He sure does romance right, doesn't he?
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
Randomize
