He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
Bridesmaid dress fitting. I look like a Weeble and Michelle looks like Malibu Barbie. I have to keep reminding myself that she has herpes so really, the playing field is more level than it might initially seem.
I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
Randomize
