After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic.
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
She was hiding under the bed to surprise me with sex. But when you took your hookup in my room to bang things out, she thought I was cheating on her. So explain it to her douche.
She's not a foreskin expert like you
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
A 3am FaceTime to go to IHOP is the closest thing to a bootycall that I'm getting
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
Randomize