I want you more than these girls want KFC
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
Randomize
