i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
I wish alcohol would automatically work as birth control if you have sex drunk.
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
I was paranoid that someone would jizz in my hair while I had the cucumbers over my eyes. Super-High Spa Day didnt work out.
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
I'll just go on tinder. Seeking strong male to help take apart ikea furniture and move. I'll touch your dick.
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
Randomize
