She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
We couldn't find him for like 4 hours. Turns out he was sitting under a tree and had thrown his phone in a lake because he couldn't figure out how to unlock it. Freshmen.
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
You caught me at a bad time. I'm stoned enough that I'm ready to sleep but also not stoned enough that I wanna smoke again but also stoned enough to not wanna drive anywhere
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
Randomize
