he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
I was so high last night that i'm 89% sure my roommates set up an obstacle course for me and timed it. Not positive.. I think one of the challenges was pairing shoes
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
I need a horse. I don't think you can get a DUI on a living creature.
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
And I feel like pitchers of margaritas accidentally make it down your throat a lot.
I mean, the lady at the Mexican restaurant insisted. She said she would win a prize if she sold another pitcher before noon. And plus I got to wear a sombrero
I made one of my coworkers cheers to me not being pregnant. I've never talked to him before tonight. Keeping it classy.
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
Randomize
