worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
I've shit my pants 4 times in 12 hours... Never trust a fart when u pass 30
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
She tried to subtly measure me, but I noticed. She told me I barely made the cut otherwise there would have been just a handshake as a parting gift.
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
I couldn't find a water bottle, so I sent her to school with her juice in a flask. Who the hell let me become a parent?
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
Ik youre sleeping but fyi its 5:32am I'm sitting in the middle of the road bra less and shoeless with boxers in my hand and no ride. Shits real crazy.
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize
