Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
He wore pink swim trunks on our date and repeatedly insulted my profession, but his cat kept standing up like a person to nuzzle my face and I felt like a Disney Princess. I hate this dude, but the cat is too amazing for me to not fake interest for.
I woke up in the bathtub with money shoved down my pants. I must've done something right.
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
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