I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
She just texted me apologizing for taking selfies on my phone then asked me to send them to her
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
I just put on the jeans I was wearing last night and pulled 4 baby carrots out of my back pocket....
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
Randomize
