Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
Just KTHXBAIed an old man for staring at me
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
Just googled "penis wearing a hat" i think it's safe to say nobody found my ex's lost phone...
I made $130 by ordering two pizzas and charging them $10 a slice. If they weren't so stoned they might have realized they could have just ordered another pizza for $20.
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
Randomize
