There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
Omfg I am plowed. Had drinks with 3 milfs. Going out on their boat tomorrow. They want to show me how buoyant they are.
Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
Randomize
