Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
well you can't waste a boner
I just remembered I gave a homeless man a ride to his bridge last night.
You know how i spent all of black friday on the plane? Well guess who's getting a x-mas gift from skymall?!!??
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
Why were you not born a dude?
Because god wanted to level the playing field
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
You don't make any sense
TEQUILA
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