Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
I queefed so loud it echoed.
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
I swear, its like my old fuck buddies have a 6th sense for when I'm going to be daydrunk. Then they start texting me. And then I start sexting them
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
I'll text you later. I think she thinks we're taking this whole "no sex" thing seriously.
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
... drunk me broke the coffee table?
STOP TALKING ABOUT YOURSELF IN THE THIRD PERSON. YOU DID THE THING.
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
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