So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
I walked into my house this morning to find an 18 pack on the counter. I think that's gods way of ringing the bell for round two.
Last night must have been awesome, my dog still smells like vomit.
I broke stuart's oven and showed up to the party with a squirrel.
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
MY HISTORY TEACHER IS FUCKING MY MOTHER. I am downstairs and i can hear the squeak of the bedsprings please I swear to god pick me up THIS INSTANT.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
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