his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
You know you have hit the best years of your life when you enlist the 5 year old to be ball boy during beer pong and pay him with candy you stole from Walgreens
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
All I remember is an overwhelming desire for chicken nuggets...
Yes, you pinned my brother to the floor by the throat and threatened to slaughter his family if he didn't drive to mcdonalds and get you some.
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
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