Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
My aunt comes over, haven't seen her in 4 years. First thing, looks me up and down and goes "...yup, that pair ripened nicely. Theyll get you some free drinks"
I think you were raised by the wrong sister
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
Where are you guys?
Drunk
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