I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
Just ran to the store on my way to the office to buy Diet Coke...the guy in front of me let me cut because it was 4 more minutes until 8am, so he wouldn't be able to purchase his vodka. I love Wisconsin
There is a bruise on my cock the size of a golfball. Bad sign.
Talking her gay man friend into dancing with me officially makes me the world's best wingman. ever.
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
I thought he was foreign, but it turns out when you're that drunk, an Ohio accent just sounds Russian.
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
Told a guy at the bar I was hurricane evacuees with no place to stay. Just woke up at his place. God bless Florence
Randomize
