Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
I told my fuck buddy that I wanted one of his arms to take home with me to hold onto in bed and he was hurt that I didn't want to bring him, like as a person, home to my family. I feel like you and only you could appreciate this.
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
I accidentally gave my prayer card to the bouncer. Clearly a cry for help #saveme
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
Randomize
