called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
I overheard a kid saying to his mom at Walmart: "Mommy.. should we buy cups for daddy's spit?"
I just farted for five sidewalk sections! New personal best.
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
Real friends wouldn't let me shotgun a 4loko after already seeing me trying to eat a girl out through her jeans.
I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
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