I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
Send help, water and tortillas.
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
Almost gave myself a concussion stealing a stuffed unicorn hanging on a street sign but hey I got home safe
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