How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
He told me my butthole was like "Narnia" and that it's a wonderful place he would like to visit.
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
Pretty sure I just pissed straight whiskey...
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize
