Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
He's married, but his wife isn't my neighbor so I don't feel bad about coveting him.
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
my sister just canceled her nose job because she thought it would hurt too much
It'll hurt less than being alone
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
Is it bad that all my wine bottles have teeth marks in the cork?
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
Randomize
