so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
im drunk. people are steering their children away from me. whatever it is that you called for, I assure you that I don't care. have a good night
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
I ripped my favorite jeans crossing that fence
That sucks
It's an upgrade! I didn;t even have to unzip my pants to pee!
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
I mean technically the bite was both in my nose and on the outside of it. I thought I was going to need stitches or something.
Why was his mouth around your nose anyways?
It was just one of those nights, man.
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
How drunk are you?
Completed.
You were cussing me out in sign language, and slurring your signs.
That's some kind of record drunk there...
Randomize
