you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
If you were a good friend you would take the nipple tassels off me before the ambulance comes.
That girl from the bar sent me a text saying that she wants to wear my cock as a hat. A cock hat. Is that good or bad?
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
So apparently I fell asleep sitting on the toilet last night while my drunk girlfriend sang to me.
Randomize