haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
I just put on my bra while peeing. I fear this will be my big achievement of the day.
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
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