Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
No awkward lesbian experiences without me
please stop taking shits in my toilet and leaving them there.
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
I used his computer to order the pizza and the only thing he had in his search bar was 'text NASA'
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
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