Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
Last night I apparently send my boss a picutre of my boobs. On the bonus part I got a raise today. So I just want to thank your parents for naming you Jeff cuz if I was not so hammered last night I would have sent it to the right one.
I swear to God, I saw my life flash between my legs.
It's hard to be a gentleman when a girl pauses her karaoke version of "a whole new world," and proceeds to tell the entire bar that she wants your cock in her mouth.
Left and drinking by a bar by myself. Everyone is in pajamas. I'm in a tuxedo. This is my life.
Hey, who is this? Sorry, you're in my phone as "you better remember".
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
This mustache is awesome. I can't pass by a mirror without looking in it and thinking damn, I'd like to give that guy a handy.
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
When I told her I was deaf and took my hearing aids out at night to sleep, she said it must be nice not having to hear drunken roommates having awkward sex late at night.
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
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