; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
I created a new tequila drink. it is a mix of excitement and fear instilled in innocent people.
sitting with a guy who's looking at the cum stains on the bed. Do you think he's convinced it's from the cat?
No. He thinks you're slutty.
It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
this will be a night to untag.
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
I have been drinking at the bar so long today that I literally just found a spiderweb from my leg to the bar.
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
There is a high pitched squealing noise coming from somewhere in my house. I hope it's a gas leak cause I'm over this week man.
Tomorrow is my bachelor party. If I die tomorrow, please know I graded you a "check" as a sister. "Check-minus" when you got mouthy.
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
Randomize
