Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
Have you come up with a team name for the beer pong tournament on Saturday?
We can be the stepdads. If anyone asks why say because we beat you and you hate us.
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
This is a mass text: my birthday is tomorrow, and I want a full day of birthday sex. Send me your availabities. Time slots begin at noon
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
If our text convos ever saw the light of day lives would be in tatters
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
Randomize
