So I went into my gym pretty wasted and asked the trainer guy if i could order a cock meat sandwich. Needless to say, I'm canceling my membership tomorrow.
Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
Ahh you know it's going to be a long day when you mistake a beer for a sprite at 10:30 in the morning while babysitting
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
doctors was a success... no liver damage and I lost five pounds.. we're celebrating tonight you get the whiskey I'll get the burritos.
You licked my eyeball, you are officially cut off. If you just missed you can have a second chance on Friday.
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
Randomize
