Welp...herpes.
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
My booty call got married. Come over before I start tagging all the places my dick has been in her wedding photos.
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
He's hot, clean, can actually cook, and best of all isn't a narcissistic prick. I found a unicorn.
Ride that fucker.
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
Pretty sure he proposed because my house is awesome. His ass is a ten and he's offering to pay more than half the bills... How expensive is a divorce really? I mean I could probably put up with him for three or four years but a lifetime is a big ask.
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