Its about time the women of america have a president they can masturbate to again
my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
All I wanted to tell you is that I fucked a guy covered in fake blood, who circumcised himself.
Just had a drunken guest at my hotel threaten to "throw a fuckin fireball at my face"
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
This is the high leading the old right now
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
Idk if I want to put a bra on
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